Hollywood Week 7: I See Crazy People

July 24, 2005

Monday, July 18
Temperatures rose to 100˚ in Burbank, and excessive AC use caused a power outage, so we didn’t go into the office today. Like a snow day, except instead of sledding, I sunned myself at the pool. I took a lunch break and perused the TV listings. Why on God’s green earth does the Discovery Channel air something called “Youth of Third Reich” for five hours in the middle of the day?

Tuesday, July 19
Today, the AC worked when we arrived, and then blitzed out just as the temperature soared to 98˚ in Burbank at about 1:00. We took turns standing in front of the fridge to cool off, made Screwdrivers, and shortly thereafter called it a day.

Wednesday, July 20
John brought in the DSM IV after we talk about how entertaining it is to read about the mental disorders we don’t have. I read it for the entire morning and now have a raging case of medical student syndrome. I have everything from Asperger’s Syndrome to vascular dementia.

Rob’s hair cutter, Kim, came in to give him a haircut, and ended up doing the same for his dad, and Mike, the script coordinator. We have a long debate about whether or not Diane should get bangs and decide no, so Kim whisks Phil off to Rob’s office and he returns with a Mohawk. I’m sorry I didn’t get my mustache waxed, as sweat is collecting on it. The heat and humidity broke into a five-minute rainstorm late in the afternoon. Everyone rushed outside to watch it rain. See what I mean? Todos son locos.

I go for a walk every day when I get home from work, before it’s dark and the really crazy people come out. Today I passed a guy on the street with LONG LIVE GLAM tattooed in huge letters across the front of his neck. I have a hard time enduring needles at the doctor’s office, so I’m not going to be getting any giant neck tattoos. Squeamishness aside, what would I even write on myself permanently? About the only thing I can think of that will be as true twenty years from now as it is today is HERE I GO AGAIN.

Thursday, July 21
Big news from the network: CBS has decided to air four of last season’s episodes of Veronica Mars, starting next week. This is HUGE. UPN isn’t one of the major networks, so we depend on word-of- mouth and advertising to gain viewers. Having another network ask to show our program is awesome publicity, and should garner us some new fans right before the season begins. We also just cast Steve Guttenberg as Mayor Woodman (his campaign bumper stickers might read "Supportin' a Woody"), and we also cast former Playmate Charisma Carpenter in a recurring role.

Friday, July 22
The boss was away, Phil was gone, and Dayna brought her two Chihuahuas for an impromptu Bring Your Dog to Work Day (I also brought my two imaginary teacup poodles, Fiona and Ernestine). I spent most of the morning working on the outline for my first script, which Phil and I will be writing together. I’m excited because my episode takes place during Homecoming Week, and features two break-ups, a kidnapping, a crazy psychic, and a girlfight. Sadly, but unsurprisingly, my episode has no sex.

Saturday, July 23
I go to a cocktail party for TV writers at the Beverly Hills Hilton. I drink too many gin and tonics while Dayna gets interviewed by several reporters interested in talking to a Woman of Color. I go home and watch four episodes of Rescue Me back to back and do a couple crafty things. Y’all need to come liven things up down here.





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